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    Vajajay wordplay: the most popular vagina euphemisms we use to beat around the bush

    On this page
    1. The top euphemisms we use for vagina
    2. How euphemisms change across the country
    3. Whatever you call it, make sure you don’t forget about it

    Lady holding crotch

    Muff or minge? Fanny or foof? We all have a preferred synonym when it comes to vaginas. But rather than tiptoe around the taboo, we decided to normalise all of the names we have for our *lower regions*.

    Why is it that we never call vulvas by their name? Perhaps because we’re all a bit embarrassed about discussing our intimate areas, or maybe it’s down to a society that doesn’t look kindly on women who embrace their sexuality. 

    Whatever the reason, we’ve all been taught slang for our anatomy since we were little. After all, using euphemisms has always meant that we can discreetly discuss our needs and issues without being too ‘on the nose’.

    But what is the nation’s favourite slang word for vagina? We conducted a survey that spanned across the UK to find out all the different words we use instead of… you know what.

    The top euphemisms we use for vagina

    The top euphemism that was used to beat around the bush was… fanny. A uniquely British word for vagina - and one that plenty of Americans would raise an eyebrow at- fanny is the quintessentially British way of referring to ‘down there’. Down there, coincidentally, takes the number 2 spot. 

    The top euphemism were as follows:

    1. Fanny
    2. Down There
    3. Bits
    4. Vag
    5. Downstairs
    6. Pussy
    7. Foof
    8. Lady Bits
    9. Minge
    10. Private Parts
    11. Vajayjay
    12. Vagine
    13. Foo Foo
    14. Muff
    15. Privates
    16. Beaver
    17. Crotch
    18. Nunny
    19. Girly Bits
    20. Lady Parts

    How euphemisms change across the country

    As we all know, the UK is famous for having a lot of different words for what is essentially the same thing - especially from across different regions of the country.

    We’re all used to the bap, cob and roll debate, but what are our nether regions called in the different regions of the country? 

    Let’s break it down…

    Vajajay wordplay map

    Region

    Euphemism

    East

    Pussy

    East Midlands

    Foo Foo

    London

    Vajayjay

    North East

    Foof

    North West

    Fanny

    Northern Ireland

    Nunny

    Scotland

    Private Parts

    South East

    Minge

    South West

    Noo Noo

    Wales

    Lady Bits

    West Midlands

    Down There

    Yorkshire and the Humber

    Vag

    Whatever you call it, make sure you don’t forget about it

    Now for the serious part: cervical screening rates are dropping across the UK. 

    In the last 10 years there has been a large decline despite the fact that smear tests save at least 2,000 lives every year in the UK. 

    Being embarrassed of the word vagina shouldn’t mean that you’re embarrassed about keeping your health in check. It's vitally important that women (especially young women) stay on top of their screenings.

    Smear tests are available for anyone with a cervix between the ages of 25 to 64 in the UK, so whatever you choose to call your bits make sure you get checked. 

    Not only that, but you can check if you’re eligible for the free HPV vaccine to protect you from cervical cancer.

    Whatever wonderful euphemism you use for your vagina - just make sure that you’re taking care of it. 

    Methodology
    We surveyed 150 participants across the UK and asked them about all the different euphemisms they use for vagina. 

    References

    https://www.cancerresearchuk.org/health-professional/screening/cervical-screening

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